Love, Hate, which to choose?

Y
Tuesday, March 18, 2008

okay..
so here's a reality check
we all need one once and awhile..

so today at around 2plus am till 4am
i did some research on religion
on his and mine
and the conflicts

so roman catholic and islam...
HmM..there were soo many conflicting views
and i do have faith in my religion
but its just some things that i dont follow
cuz i dont understand it
so i have sinned i guess
i'm supposed to go for religious classes and i still havnt

anyway..i researched on the Holy Quran!
and then i read about converting
and so many other things

Now, i'm confused..ok not exactly confused
but i dont know what to do..
i dont wanna lose him just cause of religion..
i love the way he is
his wonderful heart
and everything else good and bad
and i love the way things are now

then again my logical mind tells me..
there's still a long long way to go for us..
i mean..we only know each other for a month plus
we still got to learn so much more about each other

and when it comes to being with someone forever..
its not about their personality and character
but also about how living with them will be like
will you be happy for the rest of your life?
thats a question you have to ask yourself
and i for one know that i'm not that easy a person to live with
so will he be able to bear with me?
i have no idea!

the feeling of love
that you feel for someone also fades as time goes by..
no matter how hard you try to keep it alive..
its not easy..
from what i have experienced with my friends and their relationships
i think i'll only be able to tell if a relationship can work out after 3 years or more..

by then i'll bet my family would start hating me..
oh well..

anyway..
there's still a long way to go
and i think that we should take it real slow
see where it goes..
eventually if it doesnt work out
which i dont think would be the situation at all..
i just hope that we can take a step back
still remaining as really close good friends
cuz by then we'd know so much about each other
and we'd be able to help out each other
but it would hurt soo terribly..

gosh! screw it!
i wanna be with him!
end of story!

please believe me again at 3:53 PM